One thing I’ve been dealing with lately and seeing within certain relationships is that need to appear perfect to the other person. I have been able to relate awesomely with a number of people and in relating with them, there is this openness and freedom. We could talk about whatever flowed and even the dark part of our character, the details of angry spurts, pain that at one point may have been repressed even, and the times when we’ve been in shameful situations. As well as joyful times, dreams, and embarrassments. Now that I’m more open and have experienced this, I don’t like to go back to that nudging distrust that starts brewing when you feel someone is trying to appear too perfect. It’s feels uncomfortable and nothing seems genuine.
I know there is a point in the very beginning of getting to know a person where they may be just trying to make a good impression and that’s OK. With some individuals though, there is this continuous struggle to remain perfect. It’s very evident and just a complete turn off from trying to get to know the person or really dealing with the person at all.
One word: RELAX! We are all damaged in some way and EVERYBODY knows this. Trying to appear perfect creates distrust. The feeling that you are hiding something starts to creep up on the other person. Despite the fact that I’m a pretty open person, I myself tend to kind of shy away from people who try so hard. More and more people are starting to go by their intuition and gut feelings so trying to get to know someone who is trying to hide themselves in that way is like pulling teeth and creates awkwardness. They behave one way but there this subtle alarm telling you something different.
I know for many it can be difficult to just be yourself in a world that tries to force you to be dull or to submit to certain life style’s and ways. Even if you were to do that, you’d still get judged anyway. It sounds pretty dramatic (lol), but I mean, really.. You constantly hear people say they can’t f*ck with people who can’t keep it (excuse my ebonics) “One Hunnit” (100%/Real) etc *cackling*, yet the same folks will talk sh*t about you, and ridicule you for whatever reason. At one point you have to get sick and tired of pretending and hiding. My problem was always saying “Yes”, when I really wanted to say “No”. That’s a mask as well. Just as I was, pretending to be content when I was actually enraged on the inside. At one point you get to that “f*ck-it” threshold. You come to a completely clear realization that other people struggle with the same demons you do or worse. Or you even go beyond to look at it from an even higher stand-point: That we are all perfect in our ways, we all bring our own individual “something” to creation itself, we are all living a short journey on earth, of many journeys, that is about play. We have incarnated as different characters to experience ourSELF because we are ONE, in different forms, we are learning and we are the way we are supposed to be in this NOW moment.
Flaws are part of the game. Just relax and BE. Your true nature is beautified by flaws as well as mindless joy and fun. Think about how you were as a child..that is perfection right there, even with the tantrums, kicking and screaming and not really caring about who was watching or what anyone thought. It is the conditioning later on that made you become self-conscious and at one point if you decide to choose the path of freedom, you will start to unlearn this. I saw a posting on facebook that just had me like “wow”, because it is the mere truth. It said something along the lines of “Be yourself. When you are not yourself, you draw to your reality, people who are not in vibrational alignment with who you really are, so you will always feel like you never fit in. When you are yourself freely, you will eventually draw to yourself people who, like you, let shine their true nature, which is a match to your own.” Think about it, you’ll feel right at home. *smiles*