Letting Others Accept Themselves

People should be allowed to increase their self-acceptance and self-love while they are a work in progress. Fighting against that simply shows a in lack of self-focus. Why would the self-acceptance of another regardless of what is going on with their body, bother you? Because you are escaping from your own issues.

You know, those silly internet doctors who claim “concern” over the health of  people who are heavier. They have such self righteous attitudes, a false sense of superiority and display covert/overt bullying. Yet don’t inflict the same vitriol towards those who are drug addicts, skinny people who overeat, heavy smokers or those who are self-destructive in other ways. Anyone can tell that these people do not truly care to see a person change for the better, they simply want to feel “better than” the person by going on health tirades. They are simply full of hatred.

Most overweight people I’ve come across are advocating to be treated fairly. That is the reason behind “body positivity”. They are not ‘less than’ for being overweight. They’re not trying to force and convince you to want them with their body positivity posts, or even like them as romantic partners. But they do want to assert to the world that they are just as much worthy of positive treatment, a relationship, and self-love as anyone who isn’t overweight. They don’t deserve to be marginalized because of it.

People like to deflect a lot on this topic by saying that overweight people are forcing others to like them. No, it’s simply about fair treatment. It’s crazy to me how many people turn into doctors and medical experts just to have an excuse to berate, mistreat and feel better than overweight people. Some of these types are still under the heavy brainwashing of the media, manipulated only to accept images that are to society’s and media standards. They have been duped into being irrationally and almost psychotically angry at those who don’t fit that standard. The problem is not the person who “needs to exercise”, the problem is the internet doctor’s narcissistic bullshit. The problem is the condescending attitudes of the people who are simply too unhappy with themselves to be ok with the happiness of others.

As a person who isn’t overweight, I don’t feel the need to berate a person who is, because I don’t need to use others to uplift myself. There’s no need to place someone else below you in order to feel good if you are at least somewhat content with yourself. There’s no excuse to speak to people in a derogatory manner and resort to insults because someone is simply asking to be treated fairly. It sounds like there are some underlying issues within the offenders themselves and they use certain situations in order to direct their vitriol, the same vitriol they feel towards themselves. it’s irrational and shows that there are shortcomings and self-loathing the offenders are running from.

There are ways to effectively encourage people to lose weight and mistreating them is not one of them. This is more of a tactic of putting them “in their place” as if they are less than. The culprits are trying to make them feel bad about themselves. Striving to rob them of any good feelings and acceptance they have towards their current selves. “how dare they like themselves?”. every decent person deserves to like themselves regardless of their current state of health/outer looks. People with true healthy confidence and those who love themselves or on the journey there are the ones who actually want to see others improve..they do not use anger, superiority complexes, self rightness or abuse as tactics towards so called “helping” others make changes. Those are tactics that abusers employ when they do not want to see you improve. They want you to “know your place” and feel discouraged.

Everyone who is a work in progress has a right to feel happy in the moment if their spirit calls for it. They should feel joy while they are a work in progress because it brings even more positive changes into one’s life. Joy propels them towards those changes. Being happy and present in the moment doesn’t mean you’re settling. Only those with a rigid mindset, who do not allow themselves happiness due to some deep inner guilt they harbor, think this way. They are the ones who become angry towards another who doesn’t fit societal standards yet dares to feel joy. Because they feel that person  should not radiate more joy than they do.

The attitudes of the people who berate others , remind me of those situations when people who have been unpopular or mistreated for a very long time,  finally decide to love themselves.  Bullies and those who were comfortable with the lack of self love of that individual, come out of the woodwork and decide to label them arrogant in an attempt to gaslight them into dimming their light, and put them in that lower “place” which the offender feels that person belongs. It is an attempt at stopping the person who they deem “unworthy of feeling good about themselves” from feeling a higher sense of self worth than the offenders themselves.

Society is collectively sadistic. Many people don’t want those who have been unjustly treated or made fun of, or those who don’t fit standards, to have any bit of shine. It seems to threaten everyone else’s false sense of security. I would love to see people who are overweight, achieve their body goals or get to a healthy weight and state of being, for the right reasons. I don’t need to be nasty towards them to express this and I don’t need to give them unsolicited advice. To me health is the most important v.s societal standards. If being big didn’t cause health problems then I wouldn’t have any concern at all or be preoccupied with their weight.

For some people, losing weight is extremely challenging. Weather it’s a thyroid issue, deeply rooted emotional issues causing over-eating, which is not easy to overcome or what have you. Some give up, because again it’s tough. Everyone has their own cross to carry in life. Even for those who just won’t lose weight because they don’t feel like it, that is their life choice that can totally have consequences health-wise but what is to be gained by being hostile towards them? An egotistical false sense of temporary satisfaction? Why try to control so much, what other people choose to do with their life and health? Throwing insults or going on “high and mighty” health tirades, does not show true concern. It shows that you aren’t even in control of your own life, you more than likely beat yourself up constantly at night while acting like your shit doesn’t stink during the day and your self worth is more than likely not coming from a genuine place.