Owning Yourself

When you stand in your own power you don’t fret about how someone with more money, status, “personality”, skills or more of anything, will upstage you. Standing in your own power means to have pride in yourself and what you are made of. Weather it is socially comparable as less than or more than another. In reality nothing is comparable. We all bring our own gifts to this world. I come across many people of all walks of life who are socially more successful in many areas that I may not be as successful in. I treat them with respect and acknowledge them as I would anyone else “less” or “more” successful, and it is easy for me to do that because I have overall, a healthy sense of self-respect and self-love, which I continue to work on as much as possible.

superheroes-vixen-e1385177939338-600x739

Vixen, Source: Google Images

Working on your own inner healing leads to self-appreciation. Taking a stand in not remaining stuck in certain emotions, acknowledging those emotions, and working through them, doing the spiritual work necessary and giving yourself TLC, keeps you clear of remaining stuck in insecurity. Insecurity is an emotion none of us can ever avoid but we can work through and heal from it as new stages of being and maturity come about. Acknowledging that you are insecure and working through those feelings is essential to moving forward. Regardless of outside circumstances, you will be able to network and mingle with others peacefully when you work to keep yourself in check and come to the understanding that you are a valuable person as others are. You will come to terms with the fact that everyone is different and special in their own way. No one can take your importance away from you and you can’t take the importance away from anyone. Being empowered means that the presence or existence of others and their talents, gifts, blessings and journeys will not drive you to want to destroy them or knock them off their focus in any way. You will be more inclined to focus on your progress.

Standing in your power can mean that you will keep pushing in the face of the opposition that tries to keep you distracted from the power you have within. A lot of the time that means to refrain from lowering yourself to the level of an aggressor. Simply not engaging at all.  Everyone is powerful, some people just don’t recognize that. Truly powerful people don’t feel the need to attack, be at war with or belittle anyone.

What Should Self-Worth Be Based On?

This is simply my opinion. It doesn’t have to resonate with everyone. It’s not a “should” or “you must” kind of thing. This is just based on my own experience. This is for those who may be upset and disappointed because they don’t feel that the superficial side of life is not going anywhere for them. To the ones that are looking for something other than looks and social status to carry them and to build their foundation on. Big things can be achieved through qualities and accomplishments that are not superficial. A lot of the time building up these things is what leads you to becoming a success in the worldly side, just as long as you never forget where you come from and who you truly are.

Build your self-worth based on something of value such as personal achievements, that may not have to do with financial earnings. What can you do for others from the heart? what improvements have you made to your inner self? Think of the harmony and positive change you create around you through conscious efforts and any hard work you’ve put into your life. Not only outer improvements like career etc. but inner improvements to your character and inner well being. Working through your old unresolved issues, and working to rid yourself of old beliefs are other, most often ignored form of success. Building yourself up sturdy from the inside is what builds a positive reality. Looks fade and hard times show up in everyone’s lives. Remember what you’ve been through, and your strength. Think of the times you never gave up your will-power and pushed through to the end of something.

I am an attractive person in my opinion but I have never relied on it. I’m doing OK financially but those things are not a representation of who I am. Mom taught me well that it’s all about what you carry inside.  I have had my days where I felt both those areas of my life were not doing well and it made me upset because I wasn’t focusing on what is truly important. Building your esteem on more meaningful things is what makes you still feel awesome and proud even if you’re on house-mom mode, in your pajamas, with your hair looking like the snakes on Medusa’s head. Even when you’re not doing so great financially. Things always change and you know you’re doing the best that you can.

Building yourself through doing something of value makes you become less concerned with how others will view you and more focused on your own positive view of yourself. Never abandon yourself physically but don’t focus on looks and materials so much that it blinds you from everything else that is truly important or that it makes you think you are above anyone, because that is when you fall, and you fall pretty hard indeed. Those things are not the real you. It’s surprising how little you will care for the physical because your sense of self has been built on something greater and permanent. Everyone has something meaningful to contribute to this world.

 

 

Trusting The Universe: My Experience In Letting Go Of Ideal Outcomes

Up until a few years ago, I lived my life in high stress. I couldn’t relax very much and didn’t really know what true inner peace really was because I was conditioned, like most of the population, to believe that you have to constantly scurry around in order to achieve anything. That you have to be constantly busy in order to feel worthy of any success, and that operating in that way will guarantee success. I felt ostracized by the voices I had internalized during childhood. Being scolded for taking a quick break or for claiming to be tired. We have been taught to be totally disconnected to the flow that truly rules our lives and that’s where trouble comes in. We are being asked to go against the flow, and our own bodies’ internal clock. Everything in the universe is in sync with one another and things seem to happen at the time that they need to. There is a natural pattern that our bodies are trying to flow with, yet we fight ourselves and work against time because this is what has been always considered normal and what has been ingrained  in our heads.

In my experience, the more I fought to achieve a specific outcome, the more elusive it became. I found that once I began to trust in divine timing, and in the natural flow of things, I saw that different and unexpected opportunities would arise. Sometimes even the arrival of more beneficial outcomes than imagined. Expectation leads to disappointment in most cases, and the “letting go” process requires detachment from desired outcomes. This does not mean that I am putting my dreams, goals and aspirations in the back burner. Actually, I have already set the intention that those dreams, goals and aspirations are what I want to get to, but I don’t attach myself to them so much that I end up in a constant state of wondering about if it will happen or not. I just continue doing the work required to get to them, at my own pace. Or shall I say, at an enjoyable pace. When you have that passion and love for your work, the universe opens more doors for you. When you are not enjoying yourself in what you do, most of the time, it does not get you anywhere or the desired results. When you are relentlessly working yourself past the point of exhaustion, rushing yourself, being a perfectionist, and being harsh towards yourself when it comes to reaching these goals, wondering constantly about when things will happen for you, and/or working to be better than someone else, you are operating from a fear-based standpoint. You are not attracting the positive energy that will propel you towards your goal.

 

The motivation behind many people, for doing great in life, seems to be centered on beating the next person. I am not dismissing that there are other, more meaningful motives for success, such as the caring of the family or assuring the security of their children’s futures, the enjoyment of luxuries, travel etc. Of course there are.  I’m referring to how nowadays many individuals are driven by how the next person is doing in comparison to themselves. They want to do better than the next person, not remembering that everyone has their own path and journey. The next person’s success is totally different than the success that is meant for your own life’s path. Focusing on what another person is doing, is taking the focus off yourself. The true focus needed to monitor your own progress and to truly enjoy your work. You are robbing yourself of your own creativity because your energy is now being partially or fully focused on being better than someone else.

The relaxation and trust in the universal flow is  pretty much a form of meditation. The art of letting go and allowing.  In most cases, after worrying and stressing about job searching, bills, or many other things that we stress about in our everyday lives, you find that everything eventually works out. All the fear-based outcomes you envisioned were only unfounded and imaginary. I have had many points in my life where there was plenty of financial struggle. Each and every time I would go through these kinds of situations, I complained a lot and did not see a light at the end of the tunnel. Then as I got a bit older and got the chance to see more of my life unfolding, I started noticing that each and every difficult situation in my life, that I thought I would not get out of, ended up having an outcome different from the one I would imagine. A positive one!  All of my fears were a complete waste of time and energy, when I could have been focusing on being in the moment and enjoying my life for what it was. After having this realization a few years ago I started to just let go and enjoy my life, the big and little things. I let go of those fears because I started to trust what I have seen time and time again. Even when things seem to be at their toughest, I have come to see that silver lining.

If you find yourself in a constant state of tension, always rushing, always thinking that you will not achieve your goals, feeling unworthy because you are not working at the same pace as others or because you haven’t achieved what another person has, being a perfectionist to the point of stress, not getting enough rest (I have heard the saying “Sleep is for suckers!” and the hash-tag all over the web: #teamnosleep …tisk! your body is your temple, take care of it! Get rest! You’re obviously going to need your body!)… If you find yourself constantly doing any of these things… STOP! If I began to tell you how amazing life is and how it works for you when you are not doing all of these things, this would be a much longer article. Please relax! There is abundance and success available to everyone. Someone else having success does not rob you of your own. Breathe and set the intention that you will achieve what you set out to do, and then continue on to do your work at your own desired pace. The rest will follow. Last but not least, Do not let society and the media tell you what defines success.  Success comes in many forms!